Reflections.........by Deb

Last night, November 23, at appx 10:30PM, was 3 years to the day when I received word that a donor liver for me was available. Also, 3 years ago it was the night before Thanksgiving. I could go into a multitude of emotions, questions, concerns, feelings that have crossed my mind today, but it won't resolve the deep wish that I knew my donor's family. Then I could hopefully offer them some comfort, wish them well & Thank them for their gift of life that they had the courage to give me. I do wonder,,,was my donor a family member headed to someone's home for Thanksgiving, was it a car accident? Was my donor preparing for Thanksgiving company & fell ill? Or maybe a battle lost with illness of some kind or a fight to recover from an accident other than an auto accident? Due to time restrictions in transporting organs, and my transplant being around 7AM on the 24th, it's evident a family had to see a loved one passing in the wee hours of the night and make a decision to share that life with strangers. I wonder before my own transplant, could I have been that giving should my loved one have passed away? I've always signed my donor card, but then I wouldn't be around to know what was happening. Mainly I wonder is my donor family happy this year and planning a family get together, instead of a funeral?I think about my own family, had I not been granted this second chance, what would my family be going through this year? Simple things we take for granted are magnified around this date. Would someone bake my son's favorite pie?, whose home would my family be gathering at? The mix of thoughts are vast, some tell me not to dwell and I'm really not, more so, I'm feeling gratitude and a sense of being alone with my emotional 'To-Do' list that gets stronger when the anniversary of my transplant is here. It's strange to be so happy, yet sad, grateful, yet frustrated, restless at heart might be the best analogy.I carry a part of this person, their family, that I owe so much to, genuinely care about and yet will probably never know.I hope someone has given the emotional support to my donor's family and they realize just how greatly their actions have affected my life. I truly do treasure each day that I have been blessed with.
B~Positive, Deb